You’ve spent all these years hating on yourself, fuelling your own fears and doubting your abilities, why not try something else? If mentally putting yourself down has taken you nowhere, can you imagine what loving yourself could do? Whether it’s journaling or speaking it out loud, compliment yourself everyday. You’re so quick to judge, label and be harsh with yourself, but would you ever speak to someone you love like that? NO way! You above everyone else in this world deserve your own love and affection.
2) Spend Time On Yourself
I know this isn’t always easy. Sometimes the only time I’ve had to myself was past midnight when my entire house (+ neighbourhood) was sleeping! But those 15 minutes to myself was worth it – even though it meant sacrificing my sleep. It meant that I slept like a baby, mentally felt so much better within myself. I get it – it’s so easy to lose yourself in work/ marriage/ children/ social life but taking out a few minutes each day makes you feel happier.
3) Give Love Without Expectations
Like ZERO expectations. Give your love to people because it makes you happy (first and foremost) not them. If they happen to appreciate and compliment your love that’s a bonus. But never do things to make the other person happy. Even when it comes to serving your parents or playing with your kids, do it because it makes you feel happy and fulfilled.
The moment you do it for their benefit:
a) They can feel it – children know when you genuinely love playing with them because it lights you up versus hanging about, fiddling on your phone and waiting for them to get distracted and move on.
b) You place your happiness on another person’s reaction – the truth is not everyone is going to be in the mood to reciprocate your efforts. Your kids are going to get cranky, your parents may not even notice your help and none of that matters because you never did it for them.
Love and support others solely for your happiness not theirs.
4) Enjoy Your Own Company
I mean really, really savour it. Not waste it on mindlessly catching up on tv/ social media/ surfing the internet. As much as we thrive with others, cultivate your own company. You’re going to spend the rest of life with you, so you might as well enjoy it with or without people around.
5) Make A Small Effort With Allah
Wherever you are in your iman, make a conscious heartfelt effort to take a small step towards Allah. Maybe it’s thanking Allah for the flowers you notice on your way to work or reading a few lines of Quran after salah. Maybe it’s reciting your daily duas with a present heart or thanking people genuinely. When you strength your relationship with Allah, you also strengthen your relationship with yourself.
6) Raise Your Energetic Vibration
This might sound a bit hippy woo-woo 🙂 It’s all about raising the energy that you give off to this world. It’s not so much about what you do but the emotional state that you’re in day to day. You could be washing the dishes with the biggest smile, overflowing with gratitude to Allah and busting with joy in that little moment. That state of immense gratitude, deep love and heartfelt appreciation becomes a magnet to attract and call in all other amazing opportunities and moments of bliss.
7) Get Into the Habit Of Smiling (For No Reason Whatsoever)
Abdullah ibn Harith (may Allah be pleased with him) said: “I never came across a person who smiled as much as Prophet Muhammad (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him). Prophet Muhammad regarded smiling to a brother as an act of charity.” (At-Tirmidhi, 3641). Become the happiest person you know.
8) Watch Your Inner Mean Girl Chatter
If you find yourself getting stuck in obsessive thoughts, be aware that it’s coming from your ego/ nafs/ inner mean girl, break the obsessive thought cycle and come back into the present moment. Self-love happens when your in the present moment – not stuck in the past or future. Being aware gives you power. Notice the thought patterns and how your nafs latches onto them as it takes you out of the present moment.
9) Daily Connect With What You Really Want
And guess what? That’s not lounging on the sofa all day, eating tubs of Häagen-Dazs ice-cream in your pyjamas. Those things may look appealing from a far but as soon as you get into it, you start to feel icky. Nobody feels amazing after excessively indulging in food/ relaxation/ entertainment etc. Don’t give up what you want most for what you want right now.
10) Take Care Of Your Body
It’s hard to hate your body when you’re nourishing it (that includes indulgences too!). A huge part of self-love is how you feel in your body because let face it, when you’re bloated and stuffed, you feel crappy! That’s why I’ve included a health + wellness section on my blog because without your health and energy everything else becomes a long, tiring chore. It’s so much more than getting tight obliques and a perky tush 😉 If you’re exhausted by the end of the day, self-love becomes difficult – and a huge part of exhaustion comes down to the foods you’re eating, the way you’re moving/ not moving your body and the thoughts you think.
So there you have it my love, 10 ways to practise self-love daily. How do you practise self-love? And what could you add to the list? I would love to hear your thoughts and ideas! Your comments will be read by hundreds (if not thousands) of women from all over the world inshaAllah, so please share away! I’ve seen some of you ask questions and others respond sharing all your incredible tips and advice – soo exciting! That’s the kind of community and sisterhood that gives me so much joy.
P.s. If you want to delve deeper into your self-love and explore the magical possibilities that comes from loving yourself fully, click here to learn more about my 1-1 coaching sessions that get to the heart of the matter, giving you an emotional and spiritual toolbox to live your happiest life busting with self-love.