This is a 3 part series. You can read part 1 here to learn the first 4 suggestion on your quest to becoming an incredible woman. So let’s begin with tip number 5:
5. Invest In Your Life
How many times have your heard the following scenario?
You have a friend. Lets call her Maryam. She’s studying at university, attending Islamic courses, hanging out with her friends, going to the cinema, all in all living an average, good life. Soon, she realises her time for marriage is coming. Her family discuses proposals with her or she’s looking by herself for the ‘one’. Eventually she comes across a potential partner that seems to ignite her interest. Now guess what happens?
All of a sudden she joins the gym. She works out like a manic, sips on herbal tea all day long, cuts out the carbs and becomes the ‘it’ girl for all things of health and fitness. But it doesn’t stop there. She goes out shopping to buy the most flattering dresses that suit her body shape, she invests in quality lingerie, perfume, nightwear, make-up, skincare because now she needs to look good for somebody. But it doesn’t stop there either. She begins to pursue other passions because she wants her life to sound intriguing to her potential husband. So she takes up sports which she has never touched before like badminton or golf. She expands her knowledge on business, finance and law so that she can have great conversations with him. She becomes this incredible, fascinating woman – all triggered by the realisation that her time for marriage is near.
So the moment she dreamt for as a little girl, has finally arrived. In a few hours, she’ll place her hand into his and walk into a entirely, new home, ready to begin the next chapter of her life. So the first one to two years of her marriage are incredible! She’s smiling all day long, buying new dresses and outfits to surprise the man of her life. She’s cooking up delicious, scrumptious meals whilst letting her glossy, wavy hair flow seamlessly on her shoulders. When her husband comes home, she greets him with the most beautiful smile and gorgeous outfit! He’s mesmerized by her laughter and enchanted by her free spirit. They talk all night about their dreams of bringing up a righteous family, swimming in the turquoise sea of Maldives, hiking in the valleys of Morocco and performing Hajj regularly.
But fast-forward to the fourth/fifth year of marriage. As the honeymoon period fizzles out they become less tolerant of each other. With the arrival of their second child, it seems almost impossible for Maryam to get herself together. All those fancy dresses she brought barely fits her any more. In fact they’ve been replaced with these baggy, creased maxi dresses – that are so functional. It’s great – they hide all that excess weight from binging and overeating during her pregnancies. Coupled with the lack of exercise and stress, her health begins to deteriorate. Gone are the days of laughter and joy within her home. Gone are the days of frantically and so innocently running around the house to apply some lipsticks, spray some perfume and let down her hair just before she welcomes her husband home. Gone are her sweet laughter and enchanting spirit.
Now tell me, how many woman do you know that fit into this story? They have time for trashy dramas yet surprisingly no time for exercise. As the years go passed, they loose that wild, innocent, care free girl within them. That crazy girl that would dream of starting big charities whilst softly cuddling her child to sleep. That girl that was obsessed with fashion, health, make-up and now barely goes beyond taking a shower. Tell me, what happened to that girl? Where has she gone?
If you wait for marriage to loose weight, you will put it back on. If your waiting for a guy to kick start your dream life, you will give up soon. Because none of these reasons will sustain you forever. Sure, looking good for your husband is an incredible reason to stay healthy. But when the initial fizz is over and when your truly comfortable with each other, you’ll need a lot more than ‘looking good for my husband’ to get you to the gym and work out like a maniac.
The best reason that you can ever have is to do it for ‘YOU’. Don’t ever, ever, ever let yourself go. Whether your 16 or 60, have the dignity to dress beautifully, brush your hair, put on a little make-up, read a little here and there, visit a new coffee place and keep investing in your life. You are your biggest motivation. Invest in yourself. And don’t ever let yourself go. Preserve your personal pride and dignity.